If you have a problem with MTV’s new “Jersey Shore” reality series, here are some other things that might offend you:

• Tony Danza eating at an Olive Garden without wearing deodorant.

• Bono slurping down bowl of Lucky Charms drenched in Mickey's Malt Liquor.

• “Polish Meatballs,” a new VH1 reality show about Holocaust survivor gym rats who travel to high schools educating students on the atrocities of genocide. (OK, I made that up.)

Forgive the food theme, but “Jersey Shore’s” guidos and guidettes are a harmless pack of muscle, STDs and stereotypes there to entertain us every Thursday night on MTV. And I say God bless them, every one.

Everyone else seriously needs to loosen up just a bit. 

Sure, not every person who goes to the Jersey Shore partakes in bad tattoos, mob life mentality and binge drinking, but many do. And many will do so more proudly than ever because of the fist-pumpin’ new “Real World” knock-off that will air until MTV finally caves into advertiser pressure and threats. (There are only so many super-giddy body spray companies that can afford the “Jersey Shore” commercial airtime.)

Of course, this isn’t the first time guidos have been treated like gods among regular reality show stars. Not only does every “Cribs” owner point to gold-framed “Scarface” posters, but how soon we forget “Growing up Gotti” and the grown-up guidettes of “The Real Housewives of New Jersey." Also, I don't remember anyone protesting “Saturday Night Fever.”

The "Jersey Shore" show itself is really just a dirty Spring Break-esque hook-up fest anchored by a hot tub and sans chaperones. Sure, the cast has meals together, works in a boardwalk T-shirt shop and even occasionally goes mini-golfing, but that's as cultured as it gets.

By the way, has anyone been on the beach yet? Anyone? Shirts are constantly off, tanning is happening 24/7, but no one goes on the actual dunes that are five feet away to frolic in the low tide sand bars or collect sea shells. Or even drink 43 Coors Lights before passing out on a Sopranos beach towel.

You may hate the "Jersey Shore" stars and feel as though it violates your Italian heritage. But if I were you, I’d be more annoyed that Subway makes an Italian meatball hoagie. And you can get away with being one-dimensional when that one dimension is entertaining enough to keep me watching for 90 straight minutes.

So Ronnie, J-WOWWW, “The Situation,” Snickers, DJ Pauly D, Vinny, Sammi Sweetheart and yes, even you, Angelina, thank you for the laughs. Life’s a beach, now go check it out before it completely erodes away like our sense of good taste.

"Jersey Shore" airs Thursday at 10 p.m. on MTV...for now.

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