I’d rather listen to “Mr. Roboto” for 150 minutes than watch “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” again.

The sequel to 2007’s surprisingly decent toy-turned-movie is epically bad. And it’s 150 minutes…that’s two and a half hours of high-pitched squeals, hobo-penned dialogue and just jaw-dropping awfulness.

Action flick icon Michael Bay has managed to outdo “Pearl Harbor” with “Revenge of the Fallen” – and I can’t wait to see how the boys from “South Park” lays the screws to the man who inspired the puppet parody theater known as “Team America World Police."

I could talk about plots and characters, but why? Seriously. Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox are back as two teens in love charged with saving the world from some evil talking cars. Shia sweats, squints and drops self-deprecating one-liners. Megan purses her lips, straddles motorcycles and has her own cleavage play her stunt double. The rest is low-rent filler.

I will, however, talk about the absolute worst scene of “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.” Toward the end, when Shia almost dies, he “sees the light” and spends a few minutes in Transformer heaven hanging out at the the pearly, errrr, silicon chip gates and chattin’ with the spirits of dead Autobots. The robot spirits instruct him to return to earth and make another “Transformers” sequel so their robot grandchildren can reap merchandise rewards and go to college – and aren’t forced to get their CDLs and slum it hauling Chinese carnival prizes coast to coast. OK, I only made up that last part. The rest is all true.

The first “Transformers” was a pleasant surprise. There was some intrigue, a buoyant performance by Jon Voight and as much subtlety as you can have in a movie about talking rock’em, sock’em robots. But the sequel is a Bay of Pigs-esque clusterfudge.

We can only hope that Michael Bay punches his ticket to Transformer heaven before he finishes the third movie. If you’re an evil robot that turns into a’97 Mercury Tracer, and your reading this review via satellite three galaxies away, you know what to do.

"Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" is 150 minutes, rated PG-13 and is now playing nationwide. Mike gives the movie zero stars out of a possible four.

Check out "Screen Scene" twice a week for what's hot (and not) on the big screen and small screen.